Lifeisms In A Nutshell – #108 – How to Destroy Envy in 1 Step

Train yourself to remember that there’s always more to someone’s story than meets the eye.


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5 Ways to be Better than that Person you are Envying Right Now

If you’ve booked passage on the envy train, chances are that you have some free time on your hand. Let’s put it to better use.

1. Set aside some time to focus on your personal development

Your level of success is always going to be parallel to your level of personal development. Personal development is about investing in yourself so that you can manage yourself effectively regardless of what (or who) life might bring your way.

Personal development allows you to be proactive. Rather than wait for good things to happen, you get out there and make them happen. You may not always achieve your objective, but you will be one step closer and in the process you’ll experience a richer, more rewarding life .

2. Learn a new skill

Now that time has been set aside for personal development, decide what you’re going to do in the time. You’re looking for dramatic impact in your life that will bring your ride on the envy train to a speedy conclusion. Learning a new skill will have such an impact.

Acquiring new skills can set you apart or set you up for your next career. Here are 9 skills for starters that could help you do either.

  • Advanced Excel skills
  • Coding
  • Speaking and translating other languages
  • Photography and Photoshop
  • Writing
  • Social media marketing
  • Public speaking.
  • Project management
  • Negotiation skills

3. Get a mentor or a coach 

Seeking assistance to get off the envy train is a great use of your time.

Working with someone who has first-hand knowledge or specialized expertise exposes you to experience beyond your years, networks beyond your experience and insight beyond your knowledge.

Depending on where you are at in your life’s journey, you may need a mentor or a coach. A mentor will take a holistic view of your life and career, whereas a coach will typically focus on specific issues and areas of development.

4. Structure Your Entire Life To Optimize Your Performance

Everything you do matters. There are no isolated incidents. Every single thought, choice and action is determining who you are becoming and the life you will ultimately live. Structuring your life to optimize your performance is your best bet for keeping the green-eyed beast from derailing your focus.

Much of what happens to you in a day is the result of your habits more than your choices. Life is designed to interrupt. Find ways of dealing with life’s necessities so that you are not distracted by them. This requires discipline and attention.

5. Be Stubbornly Consistent Until You Have A Break Through

Consistency is the most fundamental virtue to becoming the person envied as opposed to the person doing the envying. To shape your talents and abilities into real achievements and master any art or enhance any given skill or talent you must be consistent and demonstrate impeccable patience.

At this point I’m sure you’re saying to yourself, “this can’t possibly work.” Guess what you are absolutely correct. I have no clue about the skills, talent or achievements of the person you are envying but while you were accomplishing all the items on this list you became better than the person you were yesterday. And that is the ultimate goal.

It is often said that “If you continuously compete with others, you become bitter, but if you continuously compete with yourself, you become better.”

Envy like anger is a double-edged sword. Use it as a potential path for your own self-betterment.

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Being Your Best: Stop Comparing and Start Running Your Own Race

At the 2016 Summer Olympics, Chad le Clos created a moment that will go down in meme history. He took his eye off the prize.

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We all have this habit: we look at what others are doing or what they have and wish we could trade places with them.

Comparing yourself with others will only give you two things: pride or jealousy. Either you feel pride when you feel you’re doing better, or jealousy when you feel you’re doing worse.

Pride will always be short lived because there will always be something or someone else to focus on. Jealousy will have you chasing a counterfeit version of yourself.

Comparison isn’t always or unequivocally a ‘bad thing’. When used correctly it can ignite positive action. However, when comparison becomes the dominant mode under which you function, you are more likely to harm yourself with it than help yourself.

Start Running your own Race

The results of comparisons are never borne of a fair fight because we tend to compare the worst we know of ourselves to the best we presume about others. Your time and energy are limited. It’s time to start running your own race.

Drop the comparison habit and pick these up instead.

Focus on Your Strengths – Your gifts, talents, successes and contributions are entirely unique to you and your purpose in this world. The more you learn to love and value your unique essence, the less you will find yourself comparing yourself to others.

Enjoy the Journey Not the Destination – Learn to appreciate where you are and who and what you are becoming, rather than looking at the lives of others.

Gratitude – Focusing on what you already have trains your mind to come from a place of abundance. This leads to satisfaction which negates the need for comparison.

Compare Yourself to Yourself – Compete and compare yourself to yourself everyday, no one else. Work on becoming the best possible versions of yourself by measuring your own personal growth and the progress you are making towards your goals.

There are an infinite number of people to whom you can compare yourself to. Once you begin down that road, you will never find an end.

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